1. Q. Why did the banana go to the hospital?
A: Because he wasn’t peeling well!
2. Q: Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?
A: It ran out of juice!
3. Q: What do postal workers do when they’re mad?
A: They stamp their feet.
4. Q: Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?
A: The players dribble a lot.
5. Q: What nails do carpenters hate to hit?
A: Fingernails.
6. Q: Why was the math book sad?
A: It had too many problems.
7. Q: What’s the tallest building in the world?
A: The library, because it has the most stories.
8. Q: Why did the class clown take a computer to school?
A: Her mom told her to bring an apple for the teacher.
9. Q: Where does Friday come before Monday?
A: In the dictionary.
10. Q: How does the ocean say hello?
A: It waves.
11. Q: Why did the boy take a ladder to school?
A: He wanted to go to high school!
12. Q: What do you call a fairy who doesn’t take a bath?
A: Stinker Bell.
13. Q: Why did the melon jump into the lake?
A: It wanted to be a WATERmelon.
14. Q: Why was the boy sitting on his watch?
A: Because he wanted to be on time.
15. Q: What did one tooth say to the other tooth?
A: The dentist is taking me out tonight.
16. Q: Why did the man take a pencil to bed?
A: Because he wanted to draw the curtains!
17. Q: Why did the gardener plant his money?
A: He wanted his soil to be rich!
18. Q: Why did the tree go to the dentist?
A: It needed a root canal.
19. Q: If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?
A: Wet.
20. Q: What kind of dress can’t be worn?
A: Address.
21. Q: Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?
A: She wanted to see a butterfly.
22. Q: Where do all the letters sleep?
A: In the alphabed.
23. Q: Which candles burn longer, bee’s wax or tallow?
A: Neither, they all burn shorter.
24. Q: Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?
A: Because he wanted to tie the score!
25. Q: Why did the tree get a computer?
A: To log on.
26. Q: Why don’t honest people need beds?
A: They don’t lie.
27. Q: There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn’t they get wet?
A: It wasn’t raining!
28. Q: What are pirate’s favourite treat?
A: Chips AHOY!!
29. Q: Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?
A: Because it gave him a big wave!
30. Q: Three people were in a boat. They all fell off. Only two people ended up with wet hair. Why didn’t the other person’s hair get wet?
A: Because he was bald!
BONUS